Annual Christmass Letter

Merry Christmas Everyone, It’s time for the ol’ Christmas letter. You will notice that you haven’t received one from us for five years and that is because of our antiquated prison system! They would not let me have sharp objects while in solitary confinement. Therefore, no pen! Please write to your congressmen regarding this travesty. Anyway, I am out now, which coinsided with Pat’s release from drug rehab. We didn’t have a place to live for a while, but things are great now. I was stealing some veggies from a garden near the old burned out house that we were sleeping in when I noticed an old school bus that had been parked in the woods. Vines, wasps, and hornets had overtaken it, but you know how Pat is about things like that. Why bless her heart, she had that placed cleaned up in no time. We are having trouble getting an address through the post office though. The wasps and hornets proved to be a problem, but we found that four weeks without a bath took care of them. They just left one day. I believe that it was the same day that the skunks moved out from under the old bus too. Our son Wilbur has his military career on track . We are so proud of the boy. He is serving overseas with a group called the Taliban. I am not sure if that is part of the air force, army,, navy or marines He just got promoted to head Mustafa what ever that is. He has been trying to get his sister Juanita involved which surprises me because they never got along. He says that he has an entry level position for her and that she would start off as a martyr. Right now Juanita is working in Nevada. She always has loved animals and told us recently that she is working in a cat house out there. We are so proud. We never thought that our two kids would amount to much, but we sure were wrong!! Anyway! Life couldn’t be better! Pat thinks that she has a job at Mickey D’s and I just got told that I have a good chance of getting that job working for that portable outhouse company. When I told them that I didn’t have a sense of smell they were really interested in me. Well! I hate to run, but I can see flashing blue lights coming through the woods. They may have gotten Pat’s picture at Food Lion the other day when she was stealing two melons by putting them under her sweater. I told her that they didn’t look real!! I said “Good God Pat!! At least get two that are the same size!! Will let you know if we get an address.

Merry> Christmas,>>> copyright Thomas Neiger> Tom and Pat>>>
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