common courtesy at marinas

I am a dock master at a local marina here in Mathews, Virginia, and I want to gripe a bit about dealing with marina customers.

1) When pulling your boat up to the fuel dock please have dock lines ready.
2) Please know where the key that opens your fuel port is. Don't expect the guy pumping fuel to stand there holding the nozzle while you and your wife discuss the possibilities of where the key may have gotten to. Believe it or not, waiting on you is not the only thing on his schedule for the day.
3) If you have been suckered in to purchasing one of those funnels that filters the diesel(which is already being filtered) Don't expect the dockmaster to wait patiently while you fill your tank by the ounce. Once again. We know that you are a special case and deserve extra attention but you will not be the only thing on his schedule for the day.

4) The dock master is not a garbage hauler. Don't ask him to carry your garbage to the dumpster for you. Would you be delighted if he handed you a bag of his garbage?
5) When pulling in to your assigned slip for the night please do as directed. If the dockmaster says to have 4 lines secure please do exactly that. If he tells you which is the most important piling for you to connect to please connect to that piling. He has put more boats into slips under adverse conditions than you can imagine and knows what to do and how to do it.
5) We have no problem pumping your waste holding tank. We use chlorine and rubber gloves, but are really amazed that the boater is using his bare hands. I know that your shit doesn't stink, but it will still spread diseases. Buy a box of disposable rubber glove, and throw them away after each use!
6) Don't leave messes in showers or bathrooms unless your mommy is there to clean up after you. Other people don't appreciate coming into the mess that you have left.
7) Please keep your darling dog on a leash. You will find that all marinas have signs that say, " dogs must be leashed." We understand that FooFoo wouldn't hurt a flea but other people don't understand that FooFoo just wants to lick them and be friends.
8) If your dog dumps where he is not supposed to please clean it up. Don't casually look around to insure that no one is looking and then walk away. Dockmasters are always getting complaints about people not picking up after their pets. This will be hard to believe but we don't enjoy cleaning up FooFoo's shit either!
9) Keep your damned dog out of the swimming pool!!! I am amazed that this even has to be mentioned, but it damn sure does!! I have always wondered how someone could actually have the audacity to allow their dog into a public pool full of strangers and expect them not to mind.
10) If you have paid for a night please heed the checkout time.If you decide to stay an additional day notify the dockmaster early in the morning. He is getting calls from other boaters about slip availability, and needs to know if you plan to stay an additional night.

There!! I feel better now!!
The Ol' Curmudgeon