Oral cancer. My personal journey

Sunday was a really good day! I felt pretty good. I never feel wonderful because of the treatments but I felt good yesterday. We went to church in the morning and then Pat got invited to go to a Christmas carol sing at a local church, and I asked her to please go. I want some sense of normalcy and freedom for her.
Several people called me yesterday to see how I was doing and to share some encouragement with me. I can’t tell you how important that was to me. Some people don’t call and I believe that it is because they aren’t sure what to say. I know that they care. I was that way myself. A call from friends or family removes the sense of isolation that I sometimes feel. It makes me feel like I am still connected, and truly lets Pat and I both know that people care.
Radiation went well this morning. We saw the dietician afterward. I was weighed and had lost 3 pounds. I was hoping to have not lost any weight. We discussed ways to combat the weight loss. I am getting off of the feeding tube and going back to regular eating even though everything still tastes like crap. Pat says that she will handle making sure that my caloric count is high enough. I know that she will!
I saw the doctor also. Both he and the dietician think that I am doing fantastically. I asked them if they really meant that and they replied, “absolutely!” which made me feel really good. I am still not taking anything for my sore throat. My throat hurts but the pain is tolerable.
There are a lot of people praying for me. I KNOW that has made a huge difference!
Breakfast this morning was 355 calories of supplement through the tube and then 2 scrambled eggs, a half cup of ½& ½ , a ¼ cup of cheese, and a handful of mushrooms cooked in olive oil and then processed on the liquefy setting in the blender until the whole mess could be sucked through a straw. UGGHH!
We look at the calorie count on items that I might eat. We went to the grocery store after treatment today to pick up a few things. We bought bologna instead of turkey or ham lunch meat simply because the calorie count was higher in the bologna.
Lunch consisted of home made black bean and chicken soup with ½ &½ , 2 slices of bologna and 2 scoops of protein powder. There was approx 3 cups when blended. It tasted as delightful as breakfast.
The main reason that I am not gaining or at least maintaining my weight is because I am not eating the other things that normally would go with a meal. For example; I would have had toast, bacon, and maybe even some jelly with today's breakfast. and I would have had a roll or 2 with lunch and probably also would have had a couple of cookies afterward.
I had some more good news! Pat and I figured that the last radiation treatment would be on the 29th. We were wrong. I will finish on the 24th. That will be an emotional day.
I continue to concentrate on one day at a time. Once in a while my mind wanders into the future and I call it back immediately. There is nothing out there but needless worry.